DISENCHANTED

Alright, this post is going out to my homie. I guess only the 3 of us know what’s going on.

You’ve made a decision. No matter how much I wish it wasn’t so, I respect your decision. I’ve learnt how important it is to always respect someone’s decision. It would be outright selfish of me to insist that no you stay, no matter what. My advice is that, you should focus on your studies. That was what you came to Ngee Ann to do anyway. Do just that. You’ve contributed so much to ______. I am sure everyone would support you all the way and thank you for all that you’ve helped us with. You were like a beacon in the darkness. You helped me find my way back when I was lost. I am eternally grateful for that. I cannot assure you that it would be smooth sailing for you throughout your course of action. I can however, assure you a shoulder to cry on if ever you are in need. I won’t say that it would be easy to just let go, you might not even let go for a long time. I can however, tell you that it would be easy to find me. You’ve been a life changer. I can’t imagine going to the same place over again without you there. I can’t imagine how it’d be like, without your encouragement, your smiles and laughs (aka crazy antics), your jumping/rolling around one leg somewhere in the air. I just can’t imagine. i don’t want to. Back then, I was always by myself. You’re one of the few people I look up to.

Every now and then, we’ll find a special friend. Who never lets us down. Who understands it all, reaches out each time we fall. You’re the best friend that I’ve found. I know you can’t stay, a part of you will never end. Your heart will stay. I’ll make a wish for you, and hope it will come true. That life would just be kind to such a gentle mind. If you lose your way, think back on yesterday. Remember me this way.

I’m looking forward to friday, I’ll get to meet the usuals. Oh such love.

OK, now talking about a completely different person. I’ve never really realized how much you cheer me up each day. Until just now. I’ve never realized how much you fill the void. I can’t really translate how I feel when you’re not around into words. It’s like forgetting the title or lyrics or a song that you know. It’s like forgetting something that you have to do, you feel like there’s something more you have to do to make the day. You’re that something. Something special. So very special.

One day an oh-so-innocent boy AKA me, wore his FBT shorts to Yew Tee and an oversized jacket to pick some stuff up from his friend. On the way, he saw some guy, that guy couldn’t stop staring at the boy’s oh-so-never-ending legs. Unnerved, the boy quickened his pace, but no, Mr Sicko had to quicken his pace and walk directly, and closely behind the boy AKA a terrified me.

WAIT THATS NOT ALL.

Just now, on the train, there was this lady whom I wanted to give up my seat to. I didn’t because i was sincerely debating whether she’s fat, or pregnant. I really was! Out of goodwill mind you! I thought it’d be a complete insult to offer my seat if she were to say “I’m not pregnant!” Turns out,she really was pregnant. I feel so bad and sorry. Afterwards, her husband came in with 2 kids. She suddenly beamed and kissed her 2 kids. I could feel her love. BUT her 2 damn kids sat beside me and were freaking annoying. NEVERMIND! There was this guy sitting beside me, sleeping. His bloody saliva almost dripped onto my CK. I could have slapped him, but I was nice. When he left, there were 2 boy twins who came in. They were about 7 years old? very cute; I’ve always had a thing for twins. They looked like Winggy, so I suspected they were part Thai. I also suspected that one of the brother is gay because he kissed his other brother. Not long after, they were humping each other! Then their fugly dad sat beside me. GOSH! he looked as if he didn’t bathe. I did spray my CK, but I’m also convinced that it’s karma.

On a more serious note, I hope everything turns out well for ______. No matter what dear, please think about your future and plan ahead. We’ll still be friends and we’d still hang out no matter what the outcome is. I’m not the type who would turn my back when you need me the most. If you ever need help or just someone to talk to, you know my number. You’ve been through your fair share of difficulties in life but back then you didn’t know Pan and I existed! We’re definitely grateful for your company and everything that you’ve helped us with. Thank you so much.

We’re so convinced we’re just too cool.

To see a World in a grain of sand,
and a Heaven in a field of Wild Flowers.
Hold infinity in the palm of your hands,
and eternity in an hour.

William Blake.

I promise I’ll take back what time has stolen from us.

Looking through my previous posts, I feel like I’ve matured and grown so much. Like I’ve become almost different, and still similar at the same time. Some things never change and yet others are as dynamic as the face of the sand on the beach. D’you know what I mean?

I went off to bed at 12am only to find myself waking up, hungry, at 3am -_-. So me being me, toasted some cheese on bread (that being a staple diet these nights) and chomp off the remaining slices of my second birthday cake. I SHALL tell you about that now.

So you might’ve already known that my best friends did not wish me on my birthday, nor the day after nor the day after after. Instead they chose Sunday. Labin dragged me out of bed early in the morning, fine, afternoon. And he was late! Damn right, I was already playing Pissy, the Bitch. Finally when Pussy turned up he made me walk and walk and walk around Vivo, casually remarking how boring it is. Then we sat at a random Starbucks and PUSSY, THE LAZZZZYYYYY BETCH, asked me to get him something to drink. Yes, Pissy was already rather bitchy at that point of time.

We went home. My home. The home that was already rigged with land mines by 6pm. Land mines in the form of Nadzirah, Jumalea and Halimah. Not forgetting, Dinosaur aka Ifah aka Jumalea’s little sister. As soon as I open the room door and said “I saw that”, I was bombarded with cream bombs. Yes my $200 jacket, Guess bag, CK berms were smudged with chocolate fudge and whipped cream. And then there was a loud chorus of HAPPY BIRTHDAY. TWICE! Not only that, the whole ceremony was VIDEO RECORDED -_-. Another surprise was in the form of “boy, your birthday present is on the chair”. FUCK: an Ed Hardy cap from Julie aka BEST FUCKEN SISTA EVAAAAAA!!! Oh, there was cookies and cream cake! So yes, It was indeed a pleasant surprise. And my parents, being their weird selves had to repeat my emow-ness to everyone who would listen. Everyone did, and no one seemed to get bored of their renditions. OHOH! Jumalea did the clean up, THANKS MARIA!!! and even that, was video taped.

PS, yes yes, my best friends are (still) the best.

I am so sorry I couldn’t make it for you birthday surprise Marissa, if you’ve read, even I was surprised! See you guys tomorrow.

Thank you, to all the birthday wishes and prezzies. Thanks Pan and Citra for surprising me with Secret Recipe’s Banana fudge cake and Prada! LOVELOVE and no Citra, you’re not “fucking irritating” after all. Your 25 bucks was well spent money. Thanks Eri love, for calling me up on the 14th, 5 minutes before midnight, very patriotic there. Thanks Wing and Mel for the slippers. Thanks Marissa and Konuk aka Germaine for the “LIFESAVER”!!! Thanks Nat for the chocs! and Sammeh too! Thanks fellow Mass cummers for one night of excitement including Marcus and Kinn! Thanks for the countless wishes and unknown numbers.

My 17th wasn’t perfect, it had it’s glitches. But whatever, it’s been the best so far. That says a lot eh? It’s like as if I’ve been wiped off the face of the earth for some of us. And it’s a shame because we live like erm… within walking distance! But no doubt, it has been entertaining. Like I’ve been spending these couple of days in a huge circus tent. Its been fiesta and carnivale.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MARISSA!!!

Well, something’s missing or rather some people. But, whatever. We’re all so absorb in our own reality anyway:)

Ok firstly, check out the post number. HAHA!!!

"I’ve got the astronaut kit, now all I need is a rocket. My love, inter-galactic friend. My alien. She has 2 arms to hold me. 4 legs to wrap around me. She’s not your typical girlfriend, she’s my alien. She can be assured that with me, there’s no conspiracy. You’re my alien."

I don’t want to hurt you, and you don’t want to hurt me. They say silence is golden, but not when we both are silently blind. They say the best relationships (are often) rooted in friendship, and we agreed. They say we’re scarred for life, both haunted by the ghost of our pasts, but we’re moving on. God must hate me, he cursed me for eternity! Can’t he find something else to do?!?!

I love the Simple Plan, Avril, Blink 182 days. You know, the soundtrack to our lives. The days we’ll always remember. The times we spent the most together. We had everything to say and nothing to hold back. No matter where life takes me to, I’ll meet you there, my best friends. Forever you’ll be right here with me, my best friend.

PS, looking at Citra now, I’m glad I’m not in Business Studies. HEEHEE.

Just a couple more days now.

FUCK ALAN CHOO WEI LOONG!!! FUCK HIM!!! FUCKKKK OFFFFFFFF!!! NO IT’S NOT A PROMISE. ALAN IF YOU READ THIS… FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!

ALAN REMINDED ME OF A MOVIE AND MAKE ME EMOMO:(

THIS IS A LIST OF MUST WATCH LOVE MOVIES FROM YOUTUBE OR IN GENERAL…MUST FUCKEN WATCH!!!

1) PRICELESS
2) EIFFEL… I’M IN LOVE
3) LOVE OF SIAM
4)AYAT-AYAT CINTA
5) BANGKOK LOVE STORY

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My 17th is coming up soon. It’ll be great to celebrate with all my friends. I know, however, some have already disregard me as one. Others have never even seen me as one. It’s alright, people walk in and out of my life, but the special few, leave imprints on my heart. Yeah, I guess thats all I have to say, this is as far as we go.

We’ll see, how this year passes. It’s been great so far, not going to deny that. Forever (fine, 7 weeks of break) starts today!

YOU’RE SO GAY AND YOU DON’T EVEN LIKE BOYS.
YOU’RE SO GAY AND YOU DON’T EVEN LIKE… PENIS!

Yes, stop complaining I’ve not been updating. Firstly, I’m such a BETCH! I’m sorry Nadia I forgot to wish you on your birthday. I really am. How would you feel, if you missed out on one of your best friend’s birthday. I’m sorry. Whatever it is, we’d still be best friends right? We’d still laugh our hearts out whenever we meet. We’d still give each other the warm hug we’re all used to. We’d still look through old photographs. We’d still reminisce our school days and laugh it off. We’d still be the best of friends. Right?

I miss my best friends. I love them.

I’m meeting Eri this Saturday, sometime at night. We’ve got alot to catch up on and alot to celebrate! It’s amazing how both Eri and Labin don’t have FRIENDSTER!!! NLB’S!!! I’ve gotten time to catch up with Choochoo, but I also want to catch up with Karol and CO.

Well, I don’t regret joining Magnum. If I didn’t, I would have missed out on the most amazing-est people. Everyone in my life is special, like characters in a play, my story wouldn’t be complete without them. Thanks Pan, Citra, Kyra, Karen and Lenny. You’ve no idea how much you’ve cushioned my falls and taught me to be strong. Citra and Pan especially, are one of the few people who would hear my laughter, my groans, my “ARGHHHHS” and what not.

Well, life’s been great. There’s nothing more I could wish for. Although it would be nice of I could spend more times with my CLIQUE!!! oh god…

We grew together, learning the same things. Listening to the same songs, hearing the same repeated voices telling us we’re weak and too young to understand. We’ve heard it all before. And still, we are different respectively. You’ve got me, and I’ve got your back. That’s how it’s always been.

Many people will walk in and out of your life,
But only true friends will leave footprints in your heart.
To handle yourself, use your head;
To handle others, use your heart.
Anger is only one letter short of danger.
If someone betrays you once, it is his fault;
If he betrays you twice, it is your fault
Great minds discuss ideas;
Average minds discuss events;
Small minds discuss people.
He who loses money, loses much;
He, who loses a friend, loses much more;
He, who loses faith, loses all.
Beautiful young people are accidents of nature,
But beautiful old people are works of art.
Learn from the mistakes of others.
You can’t live long enough to make them all yourself.
Friends, you and me
You brought another friend
And then there were 3.
We started our group
Our circle of friends.
And like that circle.There is no beginning or end..
Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is mystery.
Today is a gift

Eleanor Roosevelt.

It was a poem distributed to us during graduation. I didn’t understand it when I first read it. I wouldn’t say I do now, but I’ve gotten a better gist of it.